Take responsibility for your own choices.
By Wael Abdelgawad | IslamicSunrays.com
I’m often touched by my readers’ comments, and I feel grateful to Allah that I have the opportunity to help people through my writing.
I apologize that I’m unable to advise people personally through email or Facebook chat. I have so many business and personal projects going, and I have a daughter to take care of. And I have my own struggles. I’m doing my best just to walk the path.
If you need advice on a marriage or family issue, please to go my IslamicAnswers.com website and submit your question to the team.
Here is the best advice I can give for any situation:
“Take responsibility for your own choices and happiness. Live up to your talents and make something happen. Eliminate ‘I can’t’ from your vocabulary. Create opportunities. People will tell you ‘no’: you tell them ‘yes’.
Turn to God for guidance with an open heart and have the courage to follow what comes, rather than clinging to your own imagined outcomes. He will always provide a way out, will always open a door; you only need eyes to see it, and that comes from sincerity.
Be sincere with yourself above all, because if you’re lying to yourself then you’re stuck. Focus on your own mistakes rather than the mistakes of others, but only in order to learn and do better. Don’t bind yourself with guilt and self-pity. Regret for the past is a waste: it’s gone and you can’t change it, so forgive yourself and forgive others.
Believe in something greater than yourself. You have a purpose in this life, a mission, and most likely you know in your heart what it is, so find a way to follow that path, one step at a time.
Guard your spirit from harm but be open to love. Choose compassion again and again, even when the world makes it hard. Be patient with your family and friends. Don’t hold your love back: you only go through this world once, so let your love shine like the sun.”
If this has been helpful, then make dua’ for me. Jazakum Allah khayr, may Allah reward you all.
As-salamu alaykum. I’ll be taking a break from this website for some time. I can’t say for how long. I will continue to update the Facebook page, so Insha’Allah I’ll see you there.
Please continue to enjoy the 199 posts I have published. I’m sure you haven’t read them all!
Eid Mubarak, may every year find you happy and healthy
Last year when I posted an Eid message I wrote,
“The last year has been difficult for me personally. But I thank Allah that I am alive to see another sunrise, to see my daughter laugh and learn, to enjoy all the blessings that Allah has given me, and to have another day to ask Allah’s forgiveness, pray, work, and think. Another day to strive to be a better Muslim, a better father, and a better human being.”
Alhamdulillah, since then things have improved. We Muslims are people of patience and truth, and if we adhere to that path then Allah will never abandon us, rather He will guide us, ease our hearts, and open opportunities for us.
On this day of celebration and commemoration of the sacrifices of Ibrahim, Hajar and Ismail (may Allah be pleased with them all), may Allah ease the hearts of all who are suffering, replace pain with comfort and joy, sickness with health, oppression with liberation, tyranny with freedom, and fill our hearts with the hope and tawakkul (trust in Allah) that is sorely needed by our Ummah.
– Wael Abdelgawad
Here’s a long and beautiful Eid dua’ that I put together from a few sources:
Ya Allah we beseech You alone, because to You belongs all praise; You have no partner, You are One, Unique, eternally besought Independent, neither begets, nor begotten, and there is none comparable unto You; and Muhammad is Your servant and Messenger, Your blessings be on him and on his companions and descendants, and all who followed him in righteousness.
O He who every day, exercises universal power, so it was under Your mandate we were taken care of, and because of which we are among those who receive Your response, follow Your religion, and call You alone.
You assisted us from the day we were born, through Your favours, generosity and kindness, thereafter, Your favours followed one another in succession, and likewise, also Your rewards and mercy.
Maybe we were slow, forgetful, neglectful, careless and indolent, but You completed Your favours, and always thought of us, bestowed Your favors on us, directed us, so by Your power it is as it should be O our God, Master, and Lord, You brought Your favours to fullness, and did not withdraw any blessing; verily You are the worthiest of all who grant favours, and it is You who perfected Your bounties for us.
O Allah we paid attention, obeyed, and responded to Your call, and it was also Your favour to us, therefore, praise is for You alone, we seek Your pardon O our Lord, and unto You we shall return.
O Allah, our Lord – Nourisher, verily we have heard a crier calling unto faith: “Believe you in your Lord!” So we believed.
Our Lord! Therefore forgive us our sins, and remit from us our evil deeds, and make us die the death of the righteous.
Our Lord! And give us that which You have promised to us by Your Messengers, confound us not on the Day of Judgment, verily, You do not break the covenant.
O Allah be our witness that we were upright and firm in religion in the light of that which the Messenger Muhammad and his companions, family and righteous followers set forth, blessings of Allah be on him and them; our path is their path, whatever they said we say, we cherish that which they held dear, we deny that which they denied, we are fond of whoever they loved, we condemn whomsoever they censured, we are kind to whomsoever they treated with kindness.
O Allah keep us in this condition forever, never withdraw it from us, let it stay stable with us, not as a passing phase, so far as we are kept alive, and make us die likewise when the time comes, because this alone will give us happiness, O the Most Merciful of all who show mercy!
When I wrote the introduction to this website last year, I mentioned that one of my many inspirations for creating this site was sister Jinan Bastaki’s moving, scholarly and insightful series on Salat, written for Shaykh Suhaib Webb’s Virtual Mosque.
Since then, my article, “Remembering a Friend Who Died Badly, and Moving Beyond Blame” has been nominated for 2010’s Brass Crescent award. The Brass Crescents are annual awards that honor the best Muslim blogs and writing on the internet. My article has been nominated in the “Best Post or Series” category.
The irony is that one of my four co-nominees is Jinan Bastaki’s series on salat, the very series that I admired so much.
Sister Jinan’s articles are amazing, and it would be no shame to lose to her. But it’s nice to be recognized, and to be mentioned in such esteemed company, Alhamdulillah.
I’ll just keep on doing what I do, Insha’Allah.
Wael Abdelgawad, 11-7-2010
As-salamu alaykum dear readers,
I’ve been writing on this website for close to a year now, and I wanted to point my newer readers to some of my favorite posts. These are not the necessarily the most popular posts, but my personal favorites.
(Yes, the image says “Top 10.” But I couldn’t pick only ten, sorry!)
These are articles that took the most courage for me to write, or that represent the best expression of the message that I’m trying to present. That message is one of hope and inspiration, Islam as a positive force for change in the world, courage in pursuing our dreams, and taking personal responsibility for our mistakes, successes, and lives as a whole.
1. Agents of hope, agents of despair
2. No one else can define your reality
3. Life is hard, but the sun still shines
4. Drop and drop makes an inundation
5. Remembering a friend who died badly, and moving beyond blame
6. Islamic meditation for relaxation and spiritual comfort
7. Five minutes of health
8. When times are hard, and you’ve fallen down
9. Faith, love and kindness: secret weapons to change the world
10. A book is a garden
11. Allah and His Messenger are lights in the darkness
12. The hidden blessings of illness and hardship
13. “Muslim” – what that word means to me
14. Tell the truth and watch your relationships shine
15. Never despair: how a dying friend inspired me
16. You are perfectly created
17. Allah knows every fallen leaf, and He knows you
18. Be true, and be you
19. Try to count Allah’s blessings in your life
20. Let go of anger and replace it with forgiveness