This is a meditation that a Muslim can use to relax and recover from stress. It is not a substitute for prayer and duaa, or a replacement for dhikr (remembrance of Allah). Salat in particular is the first duty and refuge of the Muslim. This is just a simple relaxation technique that one might use either alone or share with a spouse, to relax the body and release some of the worries of the day. It also functions as an affirmation, reminding the reader of the love and peace that Allah offers us, and of each person’s pure nature.
Settle yourself in a quiet place, in a comfortable position. Imagine yourself to be in the most relaxing, secure, peaceful place you have ever known. Breathe deeply in and out, breathing into your stomach. Recite the following to yourself, with a quiet voice, very slowly, but imagine it is being spoken to you by a voice outside yourself, by a voice of love. If you do this with your spouse, let one read and the other close his/her eyes and listen:
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Your breath is warm and soothing. As it spreads through your body it makes you warm. It brings peace and tranquility to every cell in your body.
Let every cell in your body know and feel that you are loved. Allah loves you. Many people love you. You are surrounded by love and caring. The love is all around you like warm light, comforting you, taking away all your pain.
The air that you are breathing in is warm and soothing. That warmth is spreading all through your body. As it spreads through your body, it causes your muscles to relax.
Now the warmth spreads to your head. Relax the top of your head. Relax your mind. There is nothing to think about right now, nothing to worry about. Release the burdens that you carry in your mind.
As you breathe deeply, the warmth spreads to your face. Let your face relax. Relax your eyes. Whatever your eyes have seen that is unhappy or that causes you pain, let it go. Release it with your breath.
Relax your cheeks and your mouth. Whatever you have spoken that you regret, let it go, release it with your breath. It’s in the past and is gone now with your breath.
Relax your ears. There is nothing for you to listen to right now except the peacefulness of your own breath. Whatever you have heard that has hurt you, at any time in your life, let it go now. You don’t need it anymore. Release it with your breath.
Relax your jaw. Any tension that you are holding in your jaw, let it go, release it. Feel the warmth spread through your mind, your face, your neck. Relax your neck.
Know that you are safe. You are protected. You are in a place of shelter. You are in Allah’s care. You are in a safe place, a good place. You have nothing to fear, nothing to regret. The past is gone, and the future has not arrived. All that exists is this peaceful moment, this safe place where you are protected and warm.
Continue to breathe deeply and softly. Your breath warms you. The warmth spreads now into your shoulders and relaxes your shoulders. Whatever burden you have been carrying on your shoulders, let it go. Give to Allah, and He will hold it for you until you are ready to take it back. For now, let it go with your breath. Relax your shoulders.
Let go of your fear and your worry. You are following Allah’s guidance and that is peaceful. You are at harmony with the entire universe and that is peaceful.
Breathe deeply and softly. The breath spreads now into your back and warms your back. Relax your shoulder blades, and the middle of your back. Relax your lower back. As you breathe out, release the burdens that you have borne on your back. All the troubles, all the weight on your back, release them with your breath, and let them disappear. You don’t need them anymore.
Allah is on your side and He will always be with you. You have the strength of Imaan. Know that whatever challenges you face in life, you are strong and capable.
As you breathe, warmth continues to spread through your body, now moving into your chest and your stomach. Relax your chest. Whatever fears you have for the future, let them go. Release them with your breath. Trust in Allah; He is with you right now, at this moment, and He will protect you. Relax your stomach. Whatever tightness you have in your stomach, whatever tension you carry there, release it, let it go with your breath.
Know that Allah created you pure, with the purity of fitrah. That purity is always inside you, like a light. Allow yourself to feel it, to be in touch with it; let that purity come out, and with it comes peace.
Your breath is warm and soothing. As it spreads through your body it makes you warm. It brings peace and tranquility to your mind, to your soul, and to your heart. Feel it now spreading into your arms. Relax your upper arms, and your forearms. Relax your hands and your fingers. Relax your thumbs. Your hands work hard for you every day, but right now let them relax. Whatever burdens you carry in your hands, release them. Whatever private pain or shame your hands have witnessed, release it. You don’t need it anymore. Let it escape with your breath, let it go.
Know that Allah created you beautiful with the best of forms as He said in the Quran. That beauty is inside you. Let yourself feel it and believe it.
Breathe deeply now and let it flow into your legs. Relax your thighs. Relax your knees. Relax your calves. Relax your feet. Relax your toes. Your legs work hard for you every day, they have earned a rest. Relax your legs and let the tension flow out of them; release the tension with your breath.
Now all of your body is relaxed and warm. Every cell in your body, every part of you inside and out is soothed and peaceful. All of your body is pure and light and warm.
Allah is with you now, and He is As-Salam, the giver of peace. Allah created you in peace. Inside you, at your center, is peace. That peace is your birthright. Your breath is peace. Your center is peace. Your soul is at peace, your mind is at peace, your heart is at peace, your blood is at peace, your breath is at peace, your eyes are at peace, your hearing is at peace, your tongue is at peace, your hands are at peace, your feet are at peace, every part of you is at peace with Allah. Every part of you is at peace with yourself. Every part of you is at peace. Every part of you is peaceful.
When times are hard, when your spirit is low, when you’ve been knocked to your knees, or maybe just one knee… use that moment of humility to praise Allah, the Most Glorious. Then find something in your life to be grateful for.
Maybe you are grateful for your children, or your good health, or the plentiful food on your table, or having good clean drinking water that doesn’t give you diseases, or a friend who makes you laugh, or the fact that Allah has blessed you with Islam when so many are wandering in darkness and despair. Or even just sitting on the grass feeling the breeze, or a cat that sits in your lap and purrs… Find the many blessings in your life, the hidden sources of happiness, and stand up, and thank Allah.
Move forward with your head up, keeping your focus on Allah’s gifts to you, and your gratitude. Step, step, step with a grateful heart, and that’s how it’s done.
On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said that the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said:
Our Lord (glorified and exalted be He) descends each night to the earth’s sky when there remains the final third of the night, and He says: Who is saying a prayer to Me that I may answer it? Who is asking something of Me that I may give it him? Who is asking forgiveness of Me that I may forgive him?
It was related by al-Bukhari (also by Muslim, Malik, at-Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud).
In a version by Muslim the Hadith ends with the words:
And thus He continues till [the light of] dawn shines.
***
A poet wrote about this with the following couplet:
Check out this classic Sesame Street episode from the 1970′s. I watched it with my daughter last week.
I am the person I know myself to be, no matter what anyone else thinks or says.
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” – Eleanor Roosevelt, ‘This Is My Story,’ 1937
Other people may try to define me negatively; they may call me names, or put me down, or say that I’m not good enough for this or that… but I know who I am. I believe in myself and in my abilities, even though others may not.
I trust the path that I am on. I trust my guidance from Allah and my connection to Allah.
I trust in my decision making capacity, which has been molded in the burning crucible of 45 years of happiness, suffering, grief, love and loss. Whatever little bit of wisdom I have, I have paid for dearly.
So I know who I am. And no matter what anyone may say about me, I’m still me, Alhamdulillah.
And so too, dear reader, you are still you. You are the unique, gifted, miraculous being that Allah created. Believe it.
“O you who believe! be careful of (your duty to) Allah and be with the true ones.” – Quran 9:119
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
“You must be truthful, for truthfulness leads to righteousness and righteousness leads to Paradise. A man will keep speaking the truth and striving to speak the truth until he will be recorded with Allah as a Siddeeq (speaker of the truth). Beware of telling lies, for lying leads to immorality and immorality leads to Hellfire. A man will keep telling lies and striving to tell lies until he is recorded with Allah as a liar.” (Muslim)
Imam Ali Ibn Abi Talib (ra) said: “The truth teller achieves three things: trust, love, and respect.”
You know the expression, “The truth shall set you free?” It might be amended to say, “Telling the truth shall set you free.”
Being honest is liberating. It might be difficult or emotionally uncomfortable at times, but it’s so much more freeing to the spirit than lying, or living a lie. We don’t have to try to remember what lies we told to whom, or whether someone will find out about something from our pasts. We don’t have to feel like hypocrites for speaking words we don’t really mean.
The Body Tells the Truth
Did you know that a liar is betrayed by his own body? We all know about the obvious signs that are monitored by lie detectors, such as increased body temperature (manifested visually as sweating), and raised blood pressure. But there are many other signs that are detectable visually. If you live in the USA you may have seen the drama “Lie to Me”, about a scientist who specializes in body language and facial “micro-expressions” and functions as a human lie detector. This is based on real science.
For example, when people are lying, they generally avoid eye contact. Frequently, liars will gaze downward and to the right. Another sign is that liars often fidget, moving hands or feet, drumming fingers, or adjusting clothing. Also, liars may subconsciously try to “hide” the lie by covering their mouths, or making a motion that is symbolic of covering the face, such as touching the nose or an eye. These are all attempts to cover up the lie, and are a subconscious expression of shame. Lastly, the liar may fold his arms or cross his legs, which are defensive gestures, as if he is trying to cover himself up.
SubhanAllah. Even when a person’s mind is willing to lie, the body is not. It’s as if a part of him is adhering to fitra, the pure nature of every human being, and is unwilling to go along with the sin.
The body is always in a state of submission to Allah, after all. The heart beats as Allah made it to do, the blood flows, the nerves fire, the cells generate energy, carry oxygen or process waste, white blood cells attack invaders… all these autonomous processes go on without conscious thought, obeying the imperatives given to them by Allah. This is an expression of Islam at the most basic level. So even when a person’s tongue may commit a sin by lying, on a deeper level the body is still in submission.
So when we lie, we come into conflict with Allah, with society, and even with our own bodies. How could that be anything but harmful? Isn’t it a sign to us that lying is wrong on a very deep level?
Truth Builds Trust
Wael's daughter Salma at the Fresno Zoo
My daughter Salma is three years old. She goes to bed at 6:30pm, and I remain beside her until she sleeps. On certain evenings I have a martial arts class, and I hope that Salma will fall asleep quickly so I can hurry to my class before it’s over (my mother watches her until I return). Sometimes Salma asks me, “Baba, are you staying home tonight or going to your class?”
I know that if I lie and say, “I’m staying home,” that will comfort her and she’ll fall asleep quickly, allowing me to go to class. On the other hand, if I say, “I’m going to my class,” she’ll deliberately struggle to stay awake, chattering and rolling around in bed, because she does not want me to leave.
So what do I do? I say, “If you fall asleep soon I will go to my class, otherwise I will stay.” I tell her the truth, even it means that I miss my class, because I could not live with myself if I lied to her for selfish reasons, even if it’s a “harmless” lie.
Some days I get to my class, some days I don’t.
I follow this same strategy in every aspect of my relationship with her. If she says, “Baba, can we go to the zoo on Saturday?” I never say, “We’ll see,” just to placate her and change the subject. Someone did that with me in my childhood and I always hated it because I knew that it really meant “no” and was just an obfuscation, a misdirecting lie. So with Salma I might say, “If it’s sunny we can go to the zoo Insha’Allah,” and when the day comes and it’s sunny I will take her to the zoo no matter what, short of an emergency. Or I might say, “Sorry baby, we need to go shopping on Saturday and we won’t have time.”
My point is that I’m always honest with her even when the answer may upset her, and the result is that she trusts me. I see in my interaction with her that she accepts my word and believes me.
I know these are small examples. There’s nothing earth shaking about telling the truth to a little child. But you know, many people do routinely lie to their children for the sake of convenience.
Le’ts be ourselves and be honest. Le’ts take these small examples and do a close self-examination of our interactions with all our family members, our friends, our work colleagues, and our business partners. Do we sometimes lie to simplify matters or to make ourselves look good?
Or do we always tell the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable?
If we were to adopt a policy of truth at all times, what consequences would that have? Really think about it. How would it affect our credibility, our friendships, and our work relationships?
I believe that, contrary to what our fears and insecurities may tell us, being honest in all our relationships would lay a deep and strong foundation and allow those relationships to flourish.
Truth Builds Rock-Solid Friendships
Telling the truth creates strong and healthy friendships, because it builds trust. Real friends don’t just tell you what you want to hear. They don’t say, “Oh yeah, you’re great, that’s wonderful,” when inside they’re thinking, “What a crazy thing to do,” or, “What is he up to now?”
But they’re not cruel or harsh either. They tell you the truth kindly. If they think you’re doing something harmful, they tell you with compassion. When you have a friend like that, you know you can trust every word out of his/her mouth, so when your friend compliments or supports you it means something and lifts you up, because you know it’s from the heart.
Real friends are not saccharine-sweet liars, nor are they relentlessly negative. They see the good in you, they appreciate you and let you know it, but when you need some honest advice they are there with the right words.
And I’ll tell you something: most people respect truth-tellers, even if they don’t agree with what’s being said.
The other key component is that real friends are discreet. They keep your secrets, don’t speak about you to others, don’t repeat rumors. Again, that builds a rock-solid foundation of trust.
Sometimes when it's cloudy we forget that the sun is still shining behind the clouds, waiting to burst forth
By Wael Abdelgawad for IslamicSunrays.com
A Dedicated Da’iyy
The year was 1983. A few of my friends from the Fresno, California masjid were going to the hospital to visit a Muslim brother who was very ill. They invited me along and off we went in someone’s car. I was seventeen years old.
Along the way they told me that the brother, whose name was AbdulGhafoor*, was a tall, dreadlocked man in his mid-forties or so, originally from the Virgin Islands. He had several children. He made his living selling perfume oils at the various swap meets around California. He was a dedicated da’iyy, always talking to people about Islam, spreading the word. He was known for his ready laugh, and for always wearing Islamic clothes, typically a shalwar khamees-style shirt and loose pants.
Unfortunately he had developed an illness called Valley Fever.
Valley Fever, one brother explained to me, is a fungus that resides in the soil of California’s Central Valley. The fungus can be stirred into the air by anything that disrupts the soil, such as farming, construction and wind. The fungi can then be breathed into the lungs, causing fever, chest pain and coughing. Some people develop no symptoms, but individuals of Asian, Hispanic and African descent may develop a more serious and sometimes fatal form of infection.
One of my friends described how he had worked with AbdulGhafoor in the grape orchards some time back, picking grapes. He said that AbdulGhafoor was tireless and strong, and had a vibrant spirit that engaged people around him so that the work hours flew past. Another friend mentioned playing basketball with AbdulGhafoor, and how no one could beat him one-on-one.
So when we got to to the hospital and located AbdulGhafoor’s room, I was shocked to see a man who appeared to be on the edge of death. He lay prone in the hospital bed, with IVs running into his arm, barely able to move. I could see that he was tall and had a proud, distinctive face. But he was terribly thin, and his dark skin appeared to be turning white as chalk in places and flaking off.
I think my friends were stunned at AbdulGhafoor’s condition as well, and they haltingly uttered various sympathetic statements. AbdulGhafoor put up his hand and motioned us all closer. He spoke, and I could barely hear him as his voice was a hoarse whisper. He said, “The greatest sin is to despair of the mercy of Allah. Never despair. Trust in Allah.”
He smiled as he said it, as if to reassure us, so we would not feel bad. It amazed me that in his dire situation that was all he had to say.
We didn’t want to tire him too much and we left soon after, but that moment has always stayed in my mind and has affected the way I see the world. So many times in my life, when I have felt low, or been in desperate situations, have I heard AbdulGhafoor’s voice saying, “Never despair. Trust in Allah.”
AbdulGhafoor did not die. Yes, I know I called him a “dying friend” because that’s how he seemed to me in that first meeting. But he was a man with a vast reservoir of internal strength and he pulled through and returned to his family, his work at the swap meets, and his da’wah. He had a few recurring bouts of Valley Fever over the years, but he was strong and nothing ever stopped him.
I got to know AbdulGhafoor well over the following years. He became one of my closest friends. I was young and impressionable and AbdulGhafoor played a major role in shaping my way of thinking. Looking back with the perspective of advancing age, I can see that his advice to me was not always sound. But that same acquired perspective allows me to avoid judging him, because I know now that everyone makes mistakes, and the only way to avoid losing all your friends, and destroying your relationships, is to learn to forgive.
AbdulGhafoor was powerful, but humble and generous. I don’t know how many times I saw him take in travelers and feed them; or provide a room to new Muslim converts who were down on their luck; or help poor Muslims to get started in some sort of self-employment. These were people that no one else would even look at. Poor Latino brothers working in the fields with no education and no English… a rough-edged white brother fresh out of prison and newly converted, with a swastika tattoo still on his arm! AbdulGhafoor took them into his home, fed them, and taught them. SubhanAllah, ma-sha-Allah.
I remember a teenaged brother who lived on his own and had been a convert for a year or so. This young brother had little understanding of Islamic manners. He saw AbdulGhafoor in a leather coat and he said, “That’s a really nice coat.” AbdulGhafoor said, “Alhamdulillah.” And just like that the youngster said, “Can I have it?” AbdulGhafoor did not say a word. He took the coat off and handed it to the brother.
I have many good memories of time spent with AbdulGhafoor. I learned from him and admired him, but I could also be overconfident as some youth are, and at times I had to be brought down a notch. One time I was practicing Karate at the masjid by myself when AbdulGhafoor entered. He asked if I would like to spar a little. I was in my late teens at that point and had studied karate for some years, and AbdulGhafoor was maybe fifty years old, so I thought he would be a pushover. I thought I’d have to take it easy on him.
We both put our hands up, and before I even had a chance to feel him out – pow! – he smacked me on the nose with an open hand. It was so fast I didn’t see it coming. To my credit, I managed to keep my hands up even as my eyes watered. But I was embarrassed and I made an excuse: “I wasn’t ready for that,” I said. “You shouldn’t have been,” AbdulGhafoor said. “I shouldn’t have come at you like that.”
My teenage ego was mortified, but it makes me laugh now.
A Terrible Loss
Some years later I was in Arizona, living in a harsh environment, learning some valuable life lessons. I called one of my California friends, and I learned that AbdulGhafoor’s daughter Tahirah had died in a house fire. Their house had caught fire at night from incense or candles; Tahirah had run back into the house repeatedly to rescue her younger brothers and sisters. The last time she went in, she did not come out. She was a shaheedah, who died saving her family.
I remember Tahirah as a girl who was intelligent, articulate, and strong in a quiet way. A beautiful girl. Definitely her father’s daughter. May Allah have infinite mercy on her.
I called AbdulGhafoor. I told him I had heard about what happened to Tahirah. He said, “Yes?” His tone was distant, bordering on cold; I was tongue-tied and I stumbled my way through something like, “I’m so sorry, brother. I won’t even pretend to know what you’re feeling, but I want you to know that I am thinking of you and praying for you, and I know Tahirah is in a happy place now…”
There was a silence for a moment, then AbdulGhafoor burst into tears, and through his sobs he said, “You’ve always been a good friend. I love you.” I was moved by that. He knew that I was in a difficult environment and once again he was transcending his own tremendous pain to reach out to me – SubhanAllah, even now I cannot recall it without bringing tears to my eyes.
Some years later, when I returned to Fresno for a visit, I went to visit AbdulGhafoor, and I discovered that in my absence he had named his youngest son after me. It only occurs to me now that I never asked him why. It was a strange time for me. I was very emotionally bottled up, and Fresno seemed to me a place full of ghosts. Some of my friends had passed away – one of a heart attack in his 30′s – and others had moved away. Still others were now estranged. I felt disquieted in Fresno, and for the first time, I felt uneasy in AbdulGhafoor’s house. We chatted briefly, then I excused myself and left.
Even today, so many years later, I have not reconnected with that past.
I still see AbdulGhafoor at the Eids, and once at a mall where he owns a perfume oil shop. He is divorced now and only his youngest son – my namesake – still lives with him. He played a key role in establishing the downtown masjid, and he is still active there, but he no longer has the energy for the incessant da’wah-in-motion activity of his youth. We exchange salams and hugs, and move on. There seems to be an unwritten agreement between us not to discuss the past.
Never Despair
Allah quotes Prophet Yaqoob (alaiyhis-salam) in the Quran:
“Indeed, no one despairs of relief from Allah except the disbelieving people.”(Surah Yusuf 12:87)
And He says,
“Say: O My servants who have transgressed against their own souls, despair not of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (Surah az-Zumar 39:53)
Allah speaks of those who have committed great sins, breaking the laws of Allah and harming their own souls, and yet Allah extends to them the offer of mercy and forgiveness. How much more merciful and kind will Allah be to one who is ill, lying helpless in a hospital bed, unable to care for his family, relying only on Allah’s help? Would there be any limit to Allah’s mercy in such a case?
Allah stated in a Hadithi Qudsi, “I am with My servant as He expects of Me.” This means that Allah treats us as we expect Him to do. If we have faith in Allah, expecting His love, guidance and help at every moment of our lives, then we will indeed be loved, guided and helped. But if we imagine Allah to be an angry and unforgiving God, and if we expect harshness from Him, despairing of His mercy, then we commit a great sin and indeed we may not be forgiven.
In the case of illness and adversity, they are in fact a source of forgiveness from Allah, and an expiation for sins. In that sense, illness and adversity are blessings, because we suffer some pain in this life in exchange for forgiveness and comfort in the next. The next post will discuss in more detail this issue of how illness and hardship erase our sins, Insha’Allah.
AbdulGhafoor knew that pain is a source of mercy, and he knew that a Muslim should never despair, never lose faith in Allah, and never think badly of Allah or expect anything less from Allah than ultimate love and tenderness.
All these years later, I still see AbdulGhafoor clearly in my mind’s eye, weak as a baby bird in that hospital bed, his voice hoarse, whispering, “The greatest sin is to despair of the mercy of Allah. Never despair. Trust in Allah.” I think of that moment sometimes when I am tempted to feel sorry for myself because of financial troubles or personal difficulties. At other times, I remember that conversation with him when his daughter was martyred in the fire, and how even through his sobs I knew I was speaking to a man of faith. I never doubted that.
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* Names were changed to protect the privacy of the people in the story.
True peace comes with remembering Allah and growing closer to Him
When we remember God, we also realize that we are constantly in His presence, and thus we are liberated from the self-destructive habits that consume us.
So often in life we are wronged by others, and the temptation to respond in a demeaning and un-Islamic manner is very strong. Fortunately, we can avoid wrong responses in the case of mistreatment by relying on Allah and knowing that He is the All-Knowing. When we take part in wrong responses, we fall victim to disobediences that lead the soul away from righteousness, and into the pits of retaliation and cruelty.
“Surely in Allah’s remembrance do the hearts find peace.” (13:28)
Those who seek God and remember Him will find contentment and joy in their lives with the knowledge that they are under the protection of Allah. When we utter praise to the Almighty and thank Him for his countless bounties, our hearts are filled with inner peace and reflection. How happy and blessed are those who seek refuge in their Lord, the Most Beneficent and Most Merciful Allah.
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