Filed under Allah, Human Nature by Wael on December 21, 2010 at 10:07 pm
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By Wael Abdelgawad for IslamicSunrays.com
Be all about Allah and your connection with Him, no matter what’s happening around you. On Yawm Al-Qiyamah (the Day of Resurrection) it will be you standing before Allah. No one will step in to take your place. No one will dispute truth or promote falsehood. No bigot will harm you, and no lover will help. Only your relationship with Allah will matter, while all else will be irrelevant, so don’t wait until it’s too late. Let it be all about you and Allah, right now.
Represent your faith. Live your deen with courage. With a single verse of the Quran you could light up a city. With the Shahadah (the testimony of faith) you could build a nation and part the sea, and I’m not speaking of the Red Sea, but of the sea of chaos, suffering and war that covers the world.
Be yourself, speak your truth, express love in your daily actions and speech no matter what anyone else says or does. They are responsible for their own souls, and you for yours. You will not be asked about them, nor they about you. You will be asked what you did for Allah, for truth, for humanity; but that is about you, not them. The end is with Allah.
Don’t give up on yourself. You have far yet to go, Insha’Allah. Never hate yourself or harm yourself. You are more precious than the crescent moon.
Follow the path of your dream like a bloodhound. Be the ideal you, the you that shines in your imagination, the you that is brave and strong. That image of the “ideal you” that you have in your head, that is not a silly daydream, that is in fact who you are meant to be! Be that person, step out of your chrysalis, emerge from the shadows, hold your head up, and don’t worry what anyone thinks, because as Dr. Seuss famously said, those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter won’t mind.
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Filed under Changing the World, Islamic Character by Wael on December 12, 2010 at 1:36 pm
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By Wael Abdelgawad | IslamicSunrays.com
Keep faith in yourself and don’t let anyone else define your reality. You are strong and unique. You have a particular mission in this life that only you can fulfill. You can wake up in the morning and change the world, one small step at a time, just by fulfilling your unique mission.
Maybe you think, “Hey, I don’t want to change the world. I just want to stay sane, take care of myself and my family, perform the Islamic rituals and hope for Jannah.”
The thing is, life is always a contest between the world changing you, or you changing the world. The world pushes, and if you don’t push back then it will inevitably corrupt you in one way or another.
Today’s world tries to change you through the pressures of:
- blind materialism
- consumerism
- sexual imagery in the media
- constant advertising
- negative portrayals of Islam
- alcohol and drug use
- peer pressure
to name a few.
Sometimes the pressures are more brutal and blunt: emotional or sexual abuse, pornography, violence, racism, bigotry, misogyny, hatred and war.
Iman (faith) is not static. It rises or it falls, but it never freezes in place. If the world is not changing you then you must be changing the world.
You change the world by spreading light, teaching truth, being honorable and kind, behaving with sincerity in all things, showing compassion to all people, and always being just. You exert an outward pressure of truth that has a transformational effect on those around you, beginning with your family, and then rippling out to all those you come in contact with, and then everyone they come in contact with, flowing outward in concentric circles.
The ultimate world-changer – and our eternal example – was the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). Allah describes Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) in the Quran as an illuminating lamp: “O Prophet, indeed We have sent you as a witness and a bringer of good tidings and a warner. And one who invites to Allah, by His permission, and an illuminating lamp.” (Quran, Al Ahzab 45-46).
The Prophet’s light radiates throughout humanity and the ages. Any objective observer must admit the power and influence of the Prophet’s tremendous struggle. A non-Muslim writer named Michael Hart, in his book, “The 100: A Ranking of the Most Influential Persons in History”, ranked the Prophet Muhammad as the single most influential human being in history.
The Prophet grew up in a society of idol worship, moral corruption and constant blood feuds, but he never allowed that society to taint his innocent nature. Not knowing how he should worship Allah, he kept himself distant from the evil around him and sought Allah in his own way, until Prophethood came to him. When it did, he accepted the burden and fulfilled the trust, exerting an outward pressure so powerful that it changed the entire world forever.
The same is true for you and I, on a smaller scale. We’ve been given a trust and a mission. We are to be callers to Tawheed, witnesses for truth, a civilizing force, champions of human equality, and restorers of human values (the fact that many modern Muslims have failed abominably on every point does not change the truth of this).
“O you who have believed, fear Allah as He should be feared and do not die except as Muslims [in submission to Him].
And hold firmly to the rope of Allah all together and do not become divided. And remember the favor of Allah upon you – when you were enemies and He brought your hearts together and you became, by His favor, brothers. And you were on the edge of a pit of the Fire, and He saved you from it. Thus does Allah make clear to you His verses that you may be guided.
And let there be [arising] from you a nation inviting to [all that is] good, enjoining what is right and forbidding what is wrong, and those will be the successful.” (Quran, Aal-Imran: 102-104)
That is our mission and trust. If we fulfill it – even if we only try – we will change the world, maybe incrementally, maybe profoundly.
If we fail, then the world will change us, and not for the better.
There is one key to success in fulfilling our mission to change the world. It’s not purity, because in a post-Prophethood age, no one is truly pure. Purification of the soul is indeed a lifelong goal to strive for, but it is not the key.
It’s not wisdom, or power, or finance. It’s not even knowledge. Knowledge is the most powerful tool there is, but like any other tool it can be used or misused. That’s why a little knowledge can be a powerful thing, while great knowledge can sometimes be crippling.
Purity, wisdom and knowledge are goals for us to pursue. But none of those is the single most important key to changing the world.
The key is sincerity in all things: sincerity with Allah, with your family, your friends, your colleagues, and – this is the greatest challenge of all – sincerity with yourself. Sincerity enc0mpasses purity, because actions done sincerely are done with purity of intention, and with obedience to Allah. Sincerity implies selflessness, seeking knowledge and applying it with compassion, kindness, respect, and fairness.
“Say, ‘Indeed, my Lord has guided me to a straight path – a correct religion – the way of Abraham, inclining toward truth. And he was not among those who associated others with Allah.’ Say, ‘Indeed, my prayer, my rites of sacrifice, my living and my dying are for Allah , Lord of the worlds. No partner has He. And this I have been commanded, and I am the first [among you] of the Muslims.’” (Qur’ân 6: 161-163).
That is the ultimate level of sincerity, and the challenge of a lifetime. If you can even approach that level of sincerity, you will change the world, whether you intend it or not.
Life is always a contest between the world changing you, or you changing the world. The prize that lies in the balance is the fate of your soul. Who will win?
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Filed under Inspiring Quotations, Islamic Character by Wael on November 27, 2010 at 6:21 pm
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“Being careful with my thoughts, because what I think becomes what I say. Being mindful with my words, because my thoughts and words influence my actions. Being reflective and serious about my actions, because my actions become my habits. Striving to do more good than I have in the past, because my good deeds develop habits that develop my character. Examining my character to ensure that it is pleasing to my Lord.”
- Hanan K Bilal
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Filed under Islamic Character, Proverbs by Wael on November 18, 2010 at 9:02 pm
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By Wael Abdelgawad | IslamicSunrays.com
“A promise is a cloud; fulfillment is the rain.” – Arab proverb. Keep in mind that for the Arabs, living in harsh desert lands, rain is the bringer of life and Allah’s blessing, providing bounty and relief. The proverb is saying that a cloud is like a promise, offering hope of needed sustenance but not really giving it. If you want to be real, bring the rain.
Abu Hurayra reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “There are three signs of a hypocrite: whenever he speaks, he lies; whenever he makes a promise, he breaks it; and whenever he is trusted, he betrays his trust.” [Agreed upon] It is added in a variant of Muslim, “Even if he fasts and prays and claims that he is a Muslim.”
Deceivers and hypocrites are clouds that pass over again and again but bring no rain, leaving only drought and hunger in their wake.
Now, before anyone sends me a message saying, “Only Allah can bring rain!” – I don’t mean it literally. I’m speaking metaphorically, in keeping with the proverb.
Andrew Carnegie, the famous industrialist, observed, “As I grow older I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.”
If you want to make a real difference in the world, if you want to better your situation and your family’s lives, if you want people to take you seriously, then don’t only talk. Do. Bring it.
Do that consistently and people will take your word like a Himalayan mountain. You will move ahead in life like an orca – the most powerful swimmer in the sea – cutting through the waves. And you will have one of the characteristics of a true believer, as the keeping of promises is one of the most important aspects of Imaan (faith). (I should point out that the exception would be a promise to do something evil – such a promise should be broken, since there is no virtue in doing haram, and therefore no virtue in keeping the promise).
“O you who believe! Fulfill (your) obligations.” (Quran 5:1)
Amir al-Mu’minin (Commander of the Faithful) ‘Ali (RA), in his letter to Malik al-Ashtar, wrote:
“If you conclude an agreement between yourself and your enemy or enter into a pledge with him, then fulfil your agreement and discharge your pledge faithfully. Place yourself as a shield against whatever you have pledged, because among the obligations of Allah there is nothing on which people are more firmly united despite the difference of their ideas and variation of their views than respect for fulfilling pledges.”
Words are important. They are a starting point, and they have the power to heal or hurt. But even more important are actions. Fulfill your promises. Practice what you preach. Do. Bring it.
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Filed under Forgiveness, Gratitude by Wael on November 16, 2010 at 10:29 pm
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My daughter Salma
By Wael Abdelgawad | IslamicSunrays.com
I’m going to share something highly personal, something I would not normally share, but I see now that my writing on this blog is changing people’s lives, and that’s possible only because I am honest. The most vital lessons in life come from suffering. If we don’t share the pain then the message learned will not pass undiminished from heart to heart.
I have always been a loyal friend. I am the kind who believes in friendship as an enduring and meaningful bond. I am a trusting person, someone with a passionate love for the Ummah, a sense of outrage for the oppressed, and a deep faith in Allah and in humanity itself, even after all I have been through.
A Difficult Youth
My teen years were very difficult. I isolated myself from my own family, emotionally and geographically. For a while I slept in my car or in an ice cream truck that I owned, sometimes went hungry, even as I devoted countless hours to tutoring two disadvantaged children, teaching them to read and write. I would sometimes visit friends just so I could raid the fridge and get a bite to eat. I remember once digging some old egg salad out of the back of a friend’s fridge, then becoming badly sick. I collapsed in the street and was hospitalized for food poisoning.
My parents tried hard to reach out to me and help me during that time, but I was lost in my own confusion and determined to estrange myself.
Later I paid for a bedroom in an apartment that was shared among 11 people, mostly college students. I was often confused. I was expelled from the university three times, until something clicked in my final year when I discovered poetry and I suddenly began getting straight A’s.
Still, my life continued to be a mess until my mid to late twenties (I am now 45). I lived in difficult environments. I saw terrible things. I was attacked or robbed more than once and I was sometimes afraid. I experienced despair at times, and yet I became so strong, like a mountain, or a grizzly bear. When I was 27 I got a steady job and worked hard, trying to save money to start a business, until one day my roommate stole all my money and disappeared. After that I lived for six months in the YMCA, in a room so narrow that I could reach out with my arms and touch the opposite walls.
I say all this so that you know that I am not naive. I’m quite aware of the evil of which human beings are capable.
Those frightening years are behind me. I have been a working professional for many years now. I was married for almost ten years, and I have a lovely daughter Alhamdulillah. I own a beautiful home, thanks to Allah’s blessings and bounty.
As far as human relationships, I have made a conscious choice to trust people, to be open to other people’s hearts, because I never want my soul to become pinched and dark with suspicion and fear.
A Broken Heart
My divorce and the time following it was difficult. As it turned out, however, I yet had one more painful experience to go through. A few years ago I became engaged to a Muslim woman who I thought was perfect for me. Truth be told, she was someone whose family I had known most of my life, and I had always harbored some hidden feelings for her. Like me she had been through hard times in her youth but had come through loving Allah, loving the deen, wanting to better herself in every way and change the world.
I felt she was very special and I was so excited that we would be married. We spoke about sharing our lives, raising good Muslim children, and one day sitting on a porch watching our grandchildren play. We spent time together in halal ways, getting to know each other better. It was a wonderful time.
Sure, we occasionally had arguments. I sometimes said or did the wrong thing, and there were aspects of her behavior that troubled me, but I understood that no one is perfect. I felt that Allah was giving me a great gift, a reward for all my years of hardship. I was so grateful for that.
Then something happened, I don’t know what. I could speculate, but I will not. About one month before we were to be married, she changed her mind. We tried to work through it and even went to see a counselor, but the sister’s attitude became cold, sarcastic at times, even hostile. She seemed like a completely different person. It was a tremendous shock to me. After a few final humiliations, I walked away. I felt used and betrayed as never before in my life.
A Terrible Depression
The end of that dream, that beautiful future that I had seen not only for myself but for my daughter and the sister’s children as well, was a tremendous blow. I was shaken to the core. I questioned my own judgment and perspective. How could I have been so wrong? I doubted Allah’s guidance to me. Why had Allah done this to me? I felt like a shambling wreck of a human being. I could not even believe in friendship any more. At Iftar dinners in Ramadan I didn’t try to talk to the people around me. My friendly, trusting nature had been shattered. There was some piece of me, some vital component of the organic, spiritual being that was “Wael”, that was busted. It had been smashed as surely as if she had taken a hammer to my head.
For a few months I was more deeply depressed than ever in my life. I have my daughter Salma with me from Wednesday to Saturday each week, then she goes to her mother. My depression was worst after I dropped off Salma each week. On the way back, on highway 152, I would sometimes think about accelerating to 100 mph and then veering into a tree, just so that the sense of loss and betrayal would end. Yes, I’m a Muslim, and I fear Allah. And I have a commitment to my daughter. But when you are intensely depressed your thinking changes. I remember thinking that Allah would forgive me because He would understand my suffering. And that Salma would be better off, because I was not a good father to her.
In retrospect I know that my perspective was abominably skewed, and I also know that I would never actually have harmed myself. I’m too much of a believer for that. But even the fact that the thought was there shows how horribly shaken and miserable I was at that time.
And it’s true, at that time I wasn’t the best father. I tried hard to hide my depression in front of Salma, but I did not always succeed. I remember one time I was having lunch with her in the kitchen and in spite of my internal pain I was trying to hard to smile and be cheerful for her. I never wanted to let her see how much I was hurting. And suddenly she said to me, “Are you sad, Baba? You seem sad.” Such words from a three year old girl. Her words touched me so deeply that I began to cry in front of her, and I said, “Yes baby, I am sad, but not because of you. You’re a good girl and I love you.”
That is still a terribly painful memory, and one that brings tears to my eyes.
Elements of Recovery
I got through it. I survived because of three things: Allah, my practice of martial arts, and my daughter.
The first of those – Allah – should be obvious. Without Allah none of us could survive an instant on this crazy ball spinning through endless vacuum. And for a Muslim, Allah is the source of strength. He is the refuge, the bringer of peace, the One who heals hearts. Alhamdulillah.
The second – martial arts – is a lifelong passion. I plunged myself into my practice of the arts, teaching or studying classes six times a week, and practicing for hours at home. When I’m training, everything else leaves my mind. I immerse myself in the motion, the physical exertion. It leaves no time to think, to feel sorry for myself. Curiously, lifting weights (something else I enjoy) is the opposite. During the rest break between sets I have time to think, and I find that weight lifting brings out whatever I’m feeling and intensifies it. If I’m feeling good and confident, weight lifting makes me feel like a superman. If I’m depressed it spills out like acid and cripples me. So I gave up weight lifting. Martial arts, however, is a medicinal whirlwind, a kind of therapy in motion.
The third thing that helped me survive was my daughter. Here’s the thing about being a parent, and you mothers and fathers out there already know this, but I’ll try to articulate it anyway: you can’t afford to sit around feeling sorry for yourself. You have this little person to whom you are the sun, moon and stars. This little person who, when she falls and scrapes her knee, wants only to be comforted in your arms. This person who can’t sleep at night without your voice reciting Quran, singing a nasheed or telling her a story. This person who cannot live without you because you feed her (with Allah’s bounty), clothe her, and care for her in every way.
This little person looks up to you and admires you. She loves you more than anyone else in the world. She needs you as a plant needs sunshine. With a relationship like that, there’s no time for debilitating self-pity. If you can’t be strong for yourself then you must find your backbone and courage for the sake of the child.
Beyond that, this awareness that another human being is completely dependent on you, and loves you utterly, transforms you, because you are no longer the center of the universe. Your child is. That’s the amazing thing. Every other relationship in life is one where, though we may feel love and caring for the other person, we still generally think of our own well being first. Even the best friendships have an element of competitiveness to them. With your parents, you may have the greatest respect for their accomplishments in life, but you still might hope to exceed them.
With a child it’s different. If there’s a choice between feeling pain yourself or letting your child be afflicted, every parent will choose himself. When my daughter was younger she couldn’t fall asleep unless I let her rest her head on my arm. My arm would go numb and sometimes ache, but I’d keep still as long as it took for Salma to sleep. This is how it is with a child. We will give up anything to protect our children. We worry about them far more than ourselves. We fret about their health, their upbringing as Muslims, about raising them as polite and successful human beings, about their futures…
With children, we become truly unselfish for the first time in our lives. We live outside ourselves. Someone else becomes the axis of worldly existence. We love someone else more than we love ourselves. As Muslims we are told that we have not truly believed until we love the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) more than we love ourselves. In that case, our love is expressed through obedience and following the Prophet’s example.
With a child, the act of loving someone more than ourselves is constant, suffusing us from skin to soul. There is no other experience in life that allows us – or compels us – to transcend the limitations of self in this way. And in the process, the love of a child rescues us. People give up addictions, leave abusive relationships, change professions, move from one city or country to another, rediscover God, learn and study, all for the sake of a child.
Once again I find myself reaching out to form friendships, smiling, choosing to trust, to have faith in people, to see what is good in the world. I find myself living joyfully, laughing with my daughter, teaching her (among other things) about the brotherhood and sisterhood of Islam. I do this not out of naiveté but because I know that she is watching and learning. From me she takes her cue and learns how to approach the world.
What do I want her to learn? To be suspicious and cynical, not to trust or believe in people? Heaven forbid. I want her to be a person of Imaan (faith). The Prophet (pbuh) said that Imaan has over 70 parts, and among those are love for Allah, sincerity, gratitude for His favors, being merciful to all creatures, fulfilling promises, having no envy or malice toward anyone, being just, making peace, and caring for neighbors. This is how I want Salma to approach the world, so this is how I must be, no matter how I may have been hurt in the past. It’s a choice I must make.
By our love for the child, and the child’s love for us, we are utterly transformed.
***
Here’s a poem I wrote last year, after I got through the hardest part of that ordeal:
I Live
Like a summer storm,
like a caught breath
tasting of spice,
like the sudden blast of a train’s horn
when you’re daydreaming on the tracks,
love came. My diamond,
my redwood queen, my lioness,
came into her own and loved me
for a time… And then
My forest queen
cast down my sylvan dream,
and sneered at my passion…
So I lived without passion.
My heart’s wings shriveled
so I lived without flying.
My promises were met with lies,
so I lived without joy.
I was run through the back
with a tin spear
so I lived without loyalty.
Darkness fell on my eyes
so I lived without light.
Purpose deserted me
So I lived without direction.
But I lived! And I live. I go on,
knowing myself, lifting my head,
amazed at my power,
jealous of no one,
amazed by my ability to heal,
astounded by the way my love returns
like lava, the way my daughter
hugs me and kisses my nose,
believing in me, loving me,
sure that I am the most important person
in the world, the most capable.
For her, I will be.
I live! I awake at dawn
and go on, shaken but strong,
titanium lining my bones,
fire in my eyes, and Allah
leading me, calling me,
forgiving me, loving me,
never giving up on me,
coming to me walking as I crawl.
Wael Abdelgawad
Fresno, California – 2009
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Filed under Inspiring Quotations, Islamic Character by Wael on November 9, 2010 at 3:46 pm
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By Wael Abdelgawad for IslamicSunrays.com
“Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn’t be able to fly, but the bumble bee doesn’t know it so it goes on flying anyway.” – Mary Kay Ash
Just because someone thinks or says that you are not capable of something, it doesn’t make them right, no matter who they are.
Rather than attend to the insidious whispers of others, believe in Allah the Almighty, who created you as a powerful creature. Do you think Allah would create a weak being to act as His khalifah (agent) on earth?
“Behold, your Lord said to the angels: “I will create a khalifah (vicegerent) on earth.” They said: “Will You place therein one who will make mischief and shed blood? – while we do celebrate Your praises and glorify Your holy (name)?” He said: “I know what ye know not.” (Quran: 2:30)
What do you think that thing was that Allah knew that the angels did not know? Think about it.
Believe in the Messengers and Prophets (peace be upon them), and the Sahabah, all of whom did things that to our modern, “pragmatic” minds, seem impossible.
Believe in yourself, the voice of your conscience, and the urgings of your heart. When you dream of great things, don’t dismiss them as daydreams. They are the promptings of your soul, which knows better than your conscious mind what you can truly achieve.
Fly, bumble bee! Spread your wings and fly.
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Filed under Islamic Character, Proverbs by Wael on November 9, 2010 at 1:47 pm
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“The earth is very old, so respect it as you would an elder.” – Bengali proverb
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Filed under Inspiring Quotations, Islamic Character by Wael on October 26, 2010 at 7:58 pm
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“Prepare yourself for greatness, don’t ever settle for less than what’s good, right, sound. Believe in the power of your prayers. Move in the direction that you know you need to go, not the direction that you want to go. Don’t ever settle for less than what’s good, right, and sound – if we do, we will only be cheating ourselves. God has great things in store for you… patiently work towards making them happen!” – Hanan K. Bilal
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Filed under Islamic Character, Love by Wael on October 6, 2010 at 10:35 pm
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By Wael Abdelgawad for IslamicSunrays.com
A man came to the Prophet and said, “O Messenger of Allah, direct me to an act which, if I do it, will cause Allah to love me and people to love me.” He (the Prophet pbuh) said, “Renounce the world and Allah will love you; renounce what people possess and people will love you.”
This does not mean to give up all worldy possessions. Islam is not a religion of monasticism. It means that we should never value material possessions above our relationship with Allah. Give up the hunger for wealth, the blind scrabbling for dollars no matter the consequence, the obsession with the number on your bank statement. Give these things up, renounce them, and dedicate yourself to the worship of Allah. Live a righteous life, and pursue excellence in everything you do, including your work and family life.
Live simply, humbly, earning your livelihood and providing for your family without trying to own the “best” and latest of everything.
Do this, and love will flow to you from Allah.
Three Parts of Zuhd
Zuhd refers to asceticism or detachment; removing from one’s heart the attachment to the material pleasures of life. Since I have said that we have no monasticism in Islam, what do we mean by zuhd?
Yunus ibn Maisarah said, ” Being detached from this world does not mean that you should forbid what Allah has permitted, nor that you should squander money. Rather, it is a state in which you are more certain of what is in the hand of Allah than you are of what is in your own hands: your state in misfortune is the same as your state at other times; your attitude towards those who quite rightly criticise you and those who quite rightly praise you is the same.”
There are three things that are mentioned here:
1. You are more certain of what is in the hand of Allah than what is in your own hands. At first, this sounds crazy. After all, I can see that shiny silver dollar – or crisp $100 bill – in my own hand, while I cannot see what Allah holds, right? The money in my bank account offers me financial security, right?
Wrong. The money in your hand could be snatched away or lost, while the balance in your account could be devalued in an instant, or lost in an economic crash. Meanwhile, even if your money remains sound, your heart could stop and in one moment you would have passed beyond the bounds of this life. There is no amount of money that can offer true security in this life. It’s an illusion.
As for what is in Allah’s hand, it is everything, everything! It is your sight, the breath in your lungs, the blood coursing through your veins; the food in your mouth, the water you drink, the sunshine that causes plants to grow. It is everything.
Abu Hazim az Zahid was asked, “What is your wealth?” he said, “Two kinds of wealth dispel all fear of poverty:- trust in Allah, and not being attached to what people have.” He was asked, “Don’t you fear poverty?” He said, “How can I fear poverty when my Lord owns all that is in the heavens and on the earth and all that is between them and all that is beneath the ground?”
2. Your state in misfortune is the same as other times. What is that state? It is gratitude. If you suffer a financial loss, or the death of a loved one, your are patient because your underlying condition is trust in Allah. You accept your loss, and you continue to be grateful for what you have. And if you are blessed, you thank Allah and you don’t imagine that it’s because you are superior in any way. You stay humble and grateful, and so your state of being is the same at all times.
3. You have the same attitude toward those who criticize you or praise you. Again, this seems strange at first reading. But what it really means is quite simple: you don’t care what people think. What matters is your love of the truth, and earning Allah’s pleasure. You don’t care about titles and accolades, or the condemnation of shallow people. Their opinions do not matter, because pleasing or impressing others is not your goal, and not even a part of your thinking or niyyah (intention). That’s why the praise of others does not corrupt your intentions and make you arrogant, and the criticism of others does not shut you down, or make you surrender your dreams.
The Aakhirah Abides
Stop competing with others for the most luxurious car, the biggest home, the best suits of clothing, the most sparkling jewelry. Stop playing the game of “I’m richer than you.” Stop caring what people possess, stop envying others for their wealth, stop desiring what they have or comparing yourself to them… and the people will love you.
We all desire the luxuries and pleasures of the world to some degree; but the believer keeps that desire in check, holds it back, in the hope of receiving something better in the aakhirah (the life after). The believer knows that the pleasures of this world are as fleeting as an ice cube in the sun. All worldly luxuries vanish, decompose, biodegrade… while what is with Allah remains. The cities of men fall, while prayer survives. The Earth itself will crumble and burn, but the aakhirah abides.
He has certainly succeeded who purifies himself
And mentions the name of his Lord and prays.
But you prefer the worldly life,
While the Hereafter is better and more enduring. (Quran 87:14-17)
Love Allah and His Messenger above all; after that, love and respect your own soul, and then let that respect radiate to your family, your friends, your colleagues, the waitress who serves you at the coffee shop, the mechanic who fixes your car… do this, and immense, untold love and respect will flow your way from humanity, nature and the very universe itself.
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Filed under Allah, Dhikr by Wael on October 4, 2010 at 10:39 am
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By Wael Abdelgawad for IslamicSunrays.com
There are many hadith of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) about the power of this phrase, “SubhanAllah wa bihamdihi“, which means, “Glory to Allah and praise Him.”
1. Whoever says “SubhanAllah wa bihamdihi” a hundred times during the day, his sins are wiped away, even if they are like the foam of the sea. [Sahih al-Bukhari; #7:168, Sahih Muslim; #4:2071]
2. Abu Dharr reported that the Prophet (sws) said, “Shall I tell you the words that Allah loves the most?” I said: “Yes, tell me, O Messenger of Allah.” He said: “The words dearest to Allah are: subhanAllah wa bihamdihi.
3. A palm tree is planted for the reciter [of the above] in Paradise. [at-Tirmidhi; 5:511, al-Hakim]
4. The Prophet Muhammad (sws) said: “Two words (subhanAllah wa bihamdihi) are light on the tongue, weigh heavily in the balance, and are loved by the Most Merciful One.”
Allah is so forgiving and gives us countless avenues to earn our forgiveness. Today, let’s have this phrase – subhanAllah wa bihamdihi – on our tongues, and let’s earn our forgiveness, and have entire groves of palm trees planted for us in Jannah, Insha’Allah.
Praise going up, blessings coming down
Of course there are many types of dhikr. Dhikr means praising Allah, remembering Allah. SubhanAllah wa bihamdihi is a good one, but even something as simple as saying, “Thank you, Allah” when you finish a meal is a type of dhikr.
When we have dhikr always on our tongues, we have this constant connection with God, even as we go about our daily routines. When things are going well, or when things are hard, we have this lifeline to Allah, this constant stream of praise going up, and blessings coming down. Our spirits are lighter, our hearts happier. We are grateful for everything we have, because we remember that every single little blessing – good health, the comfortable beds we sleep in, the orange juice we had for breakfast, even our beating hearts and the breath in our lungs – comes from Allah.
Dhikr is a guide to excellent character, and a light that keeps us on the path to Paradise.
We covet what we think about
Here’s another important point. I am the editor of IslamicAnswers.com, which is a common-sense advice website for marriage and family issues. One type of common question I get is from a young person who is madly in love with someone who is unavailable. Maybe the unavailable person is already married, or is not interested, or the parents do not approve, but it’s clear that the match is impossible.
One thing I tell such a young person is, stop thinking about the object of your desire. When the thoughts come, push them away. Absolutely do not spend your time gazing at photographs of him/her, reading old emails, dwelling on what-ifs, and fantasizing, because that will only reinforce your obsession, and keep the unavailable person in your mind.
What we think about, we come to desire.
With dhikr, we are using this principle for good. By constantly praising Allah, we keep Him in our minds and hearts. The more we do so, the more we come to desire His love, His forgiveness, and His presence. The more we think about Allah, the more we want to please Him. It becomes a beautiful cycle of remembrance and blessings, reinforcing each other.
That’s why Allah described the believers as,
“Who remember Allaah while standing or sitting or [lying] on their sides.” [3:191]
“…and the men who remember Allaah often and the women who do so – for them Allaah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward.” [33:35]
“O you who have believed, remember Allaah with much remembrance. And exalt Him morning and afternoon.” [33:41-42]
The living and the dead
There is a very powerful hadith of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) in which he said,
“The example of the one who remembers his Lord (God) in comparison with the one who does not remember his Lord is that of the living and the dead.” [Sahih al-Bukhari; 11:208, Muslim; 1:539]
I could write an entire essay about that one hadith, but I’ll just say that the essence of life is our need for Allah. Without Him, our hearts would not beat, the rain would not fall, there would be no food on our tables, and no joy in our hearts. When we remember Allah we prove that we are spiritually alive. We acknowledge our need for the One God, and we acknowledge His favors upon us.
Conversely, if we do not remember Him, it’s as if we are spiritually dead. That’s why the famous classical scholar Shaykhul Islam ibn Taymiyyah said, “The example of dhikr to the heart is that of fish to water.”
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